They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Help me help you realize you are a moron
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize