Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
ttyl tear gas
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
