Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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