Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
