My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
