Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
