Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
