It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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