fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
