dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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