will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
