Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
