Texts From Last Night · misty327's Favorites

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misty327's Favorites Texts:

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(607): View more from New York

i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.

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(817): View more from Texas

Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button

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(905): View more from Ontario

while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"

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(773): View more from Illinois

I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.

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(818): View more from California

you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me

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(330): View more from Ohio

He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky

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