Texts From Last Night · jo_uohyeah's Favorites

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jo_uohyeah's Favorites Texts:

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(517): View more from Michigan

I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.

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(850): View more from Florida

You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem

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(740): View more from Ohio

Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.

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But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?

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(301): View more from Maryland

You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.

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(773): View more from Illinois

I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid

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