Texts From Last Night · HawkeyeEG's Favorites

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HawkeyeEG's Favorites Texts:

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(801): View more from Utah

I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

My god, what have you done?

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(616): View more from Michigan

Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.

(1-616): View more from Michigan

Dude that's a hat trick!

(616): View more from Michigan

I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.

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(760): View more from California

My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town

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(718): View more from New York

Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.

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(631): View more from New York

Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.

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