I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
