sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize