Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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