Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
