So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
