We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
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