Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
you inspire me to be a worse person
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
PANTIES FOUND
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