Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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