Heybabeimwearingurpanties
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
