Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
