Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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