My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
