I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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