My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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