no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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