dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
