I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
