No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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