He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
