dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
