Swine flu. Run for my life!
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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