Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just gift wrapped bread.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I touched a dick in church today
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
