Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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