i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
