Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize
