The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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