And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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