some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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