i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize