I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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