she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
