But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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