whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Everclear isn't food dammit
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
