yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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