I don't usually arrange sex via text message
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
