The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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